Dr Ken Lipengas tongue in the cheek Half a day has passed without a single press release from the quarrelsome duo, MACRA and DSTV Might even be the whole day, fingers crossed.
I take this with mixed feelings, and even a measure of trepidation. You see, in the past few weeks, I have read 24 books, including re-readingTolstoy’s War and Peace, Victor Hugo’s Les Miserables, James Joyce’s Ullyses, Nelson Mandela’s Long Walk to Freedom, and Bingu wa Mutharika’s African Dream. I’ve even managed to add a chapter to my own painfully slow-moving manuscript.
My doctor has also said he’s noticed a change in my health profile as a result of getting to bed early, scoring the much-vaunted eight hours per day, sometimes even more.
All this, thanks to the profoundly wise and epoch-changing decision to deprive us of DSTV. I’m now convinced that the folks at MACRA and DSTV are doing all this for our own good: to improve our health status, promote reading habits, and enable family members to talk to each other. A very clever plan to bring sanity to households. Without the Premier League, families are bonding together, marriages getting stronger. Such unprecedented vision on the part of MACRA and DSTV.
When, a week or so ago, MACRA hinted that their quarrel with DSTV might be about to be resolved, I was deeply concerned. Heaven forbid, said I. That meant tv binge watching would be right back, along with sleep deprivation, to the detriment of our physical and intellectual well-being. It was a moment of profound anxiety.
To my relief, yesterday’s amusing cacophony of press releases from both sides, apart from their dubious entertainment value, showed clearly that the quarrelsome duo are nowhere near an agreement. That was very reassuring. There’s hope after all. While these two try to outdo each other with their inane displays of self-absorption, our reading habits will continue to improve, and a whole nation’s health profile will be on the mend, thanks to longer sleeping hours. I might even finish writing my book!
We should all kneel down everyday and express our unfathomable gratitude to the quarrelsome duo.
Opinion from his Facebook Page